Day23:The Last Person You Kissed

To Luis...

Our love sprouted when you surprised me with a phone call this one particular school night.

-Hello?

Hey this is Luis

-WHO? Which Luis?Pink Luis?Curly haired Luis?

Quiet Luis

-Ohh hey whats up?

(Gets to know each other)Blah Blah Blah

I quickly swooned over you. You and I shared thoughts, secrets and fears that were greater than the two of us. My cherish-able memory was the night when You, I and several of our friends went to an elevated area of Elysian Park overlooking the city. We take in the view, utter words here and there, then finally sit down on the cold pavement. Then comes the dare game. Everyone had their share of dares, when finally comes my turn. It was obvious that they were going to dare us to kiss. Everyone stood silent, we both lean in and touched lips. "WO0o0!",the crowd cheers. We all walk back home, parting ways. You walk me home with a few others. I am yet given another kiss by you and we call it a night. Weeks later, it's Valentine's day and you hand me a bouquet of roses, holding a guitar on your left hand. We sit down, as I was waiting for you to serenade me. You never did. Instead I received something better. You asked me to be your girlfriend. I was so happy I nearly wet my pants.

Although we have been broken up a few times, it was very foolish of me to even think I could even get over you. I'm ever so sorry that I've caused you pain. I don't deserve you but I want you to know, you are the best thing that has happened to me. No one will ever know what we're about. I would die for you my love.

As I smoked this cigarette, I kissed my childhood goodbye.

The big 2-1...

I am not having the time of my life. If anything, life has become grim. I don't feel inspired, only tired. I've come to realize those worth suffering for and those here for the moment. I want to partake in life's pleasures but don't know how. Often viewed as a girl filled with joy but on the inside I feel like a stern hag. I really don't know what's wrong with the picture. I have good friends, I keep myself busy with school and I have an amazing man in my life. I've come to conclude that it's probably just human instinct to hate your life once in a while. I am clueless to what these symptoms are but I hope they get better soon. I'm tired of being moody and having emotions.

Day18:The Person That You Wish You Could Be

I only want to be me.